ISRAEL — U.S. Ambassador Mike Huckabee was seen by spectators today flanked by American military personnel, some of whom were also helping him carry the Arc of the Covenant in the direction of Iran.

“We… we are stunned,” said one Jewish spectator, “we thought the Arc was lost to time, but now this American is carrying it into battle.” Another told The Roman Caller, “I don’t even know how to process this. Just look at the way he is dressed,” referring to the fact that Huckabee was wearing the regalia of the High Levitical Priest.

While the U.S. government did not outright denounce Huckabee’s actions, they did release a statement indicating that they may not have been aware of the existence of the Arc of the Covenant. “The United States continues to defend and assist its closest allies by whatever means possible, even in less-conventional biblical methodologies. While we cannot speak to the attainment of the Arc at this time, we can say that Ambassador Huckabee’s actions are his own.”

Huckabee was last heard grunting and mumbling something about “conquest.”