WASHINGTON — A leaked memo from the Archdiocese of Washington DC revealed Wednesday that Monsignor Stephen Rossetti was “fired” from his post as exorcist because of a complainet filed by extraterrestrials who were allegedly offended at his statements.

The whole affair began after Rossetti made several statements calling alien activity demonic. A memo that was leaked to The Roman Caller by reputable sources details the whole process of the aliens from Porgon 3 descending over the DC chancery and demanding that the front desk lady “take them to their leader.” The front desk lady, after refusing several times to take them to Cardinal McElroy, was then reportedly “blasted by the aliens to a dimension just outside the Realm of Har.” The aliens, thereafter, realized that McElroy was out for the day and decided to file a complaint on the online accountability platform for the Archdiocese.

In a statement following the revelations of the memo, the Archdiocese released a statement claiming, “we do not discriminate against any kind of aliens… even extraterrestrials.”

Rossetti was unavailable for comment, but sources claim he may have been abducted following the incident.